Struggling

I'm going to give it to you straight.  I'm struggling!  I think I've entered the joys of what is known as a "fibro flare-up".  It started toward the end of last week and is hanging on for dear life.  I am so extremely tired I'm afraid to drive anywhere because I'm afraid I will fall asleep at the wheel.  When I wake up in the morning I feel like I haven't slept at all and that my body somehow went from being 33 to 95 overnight.  My hands are so stiff and swollen when I wake up I can't use them for an hour or more.  I have to fix the girls' hair before they go to bed at night because I just can't make my hands do it in the morning.  All of my joints ache and my head hasn't stopped pounding for days.  In short, I feel terrible.

Last night I decided I was going to quit my blog.  I used to love it, but the last couple of weeks have been hard.  I am so behind on housework and helping the kiddos with homework and piano lessons it is ridiculous.  I haven't cooked a real dinner in almost a week.  I feel like my life is unraveling and there is not a thing I can do about it.

I'm sad becuase I have gotten to know so many amazing people and my linky parties are starting to take off and my followers are starting to climb pretty quickly.  But I just can't do it...not right now.  I don't know if I'm going to quit it for keeps or just for a little bit, but I have to give myself permission to stop for now.  I'll see how I feel when my "flare-up" decides to "flare-down" and I get my real life under control again.  I will still post things if I think they are awesome, but I'm not going to push myself to do it everyday.

Thanks for understanding.

Thoughtful Thursday -- What lies in you?

After my first 3 babies were born it took me between 6 and 9 months to really feel good again.  You know, semi-rested and energized and organized...able to handle it all.  My pregnancy with my last child was really tough and my delivery was terrible and he had acid reflux REALLY bad (for a whole year).  I wasn't very surprised when 9 months passed and I didn't feel good yet.  But after a year and then a year and a half passed and I still didn't feel good I started to worry.  I went to the Dr. with all of my complaints and she started running tests.  I will spare you the details, but just know that I was tested for every possible disease/illness known to man and all of them came back negative.  I have been to multiple Dr.s too and all of them have come up with nothing.  Well friends, after almost 2 years of searching, the Dr.s have finally decided what is "wrong" with me.

Fibromyalgia.

I hate that word.  I hoped that once they figured out what was wrong we would be able to do something about it.  This diagnosis wasn't what I wanted to hear.  Part of the reason is because I have always sort of thought that Fibromyalgia was a fake disease.  One for hypochondriacs or one that Dr.s made up because they were tired of not knowing what the heck was going on.  Not only do I feel ill most of the time, I have eaten about 10 slices of humble pie over the last few weeks.  I know that what I'm feeling isn't some fake illness that I've made up to get attention.  And I know that all of my Dr.s have worked extremely hard to figure out what is wrong with me.  We're trying a few different things as far as treatment goes, but the whole process is sort of hit or miss.  I guess I just haven't wrapped my head around it yet.

As I was searching for an inspirational quote for today's post this one struck me with so much force it almost knocked me out of my chair.  I am strong enough to deal with this and make my life good again.  I am strong enough because what lies in me is from God and He gives us the very best.

"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us." ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Today is the day!!

6 weeks of no sugar (mostly) and I'm ready to start "training".  Don't know what I'm talking about?  Read this.  Want to join in?  Then get outside and go for a walk!  Leave a comment and let me know if you're doing it.  We can support each other.

As for why I haven't posted in a few weeks?  Well, there are lots of reasons.  Some good, and some not so good.  I'll tell you all about it later today.  Right now, we're going to walk to school.

No Sugar---Day 1

Today is the day!!!  No sugar.  My plan is to clean everytime I want to eat some sugar.  My house will be spotless by bedtime!  :)  I'll let you all know how it goes.

New You Challenge

One of my very dear friends emailed me this week and asked if I was interested in training for a half marathon (13.1 miles) with her.  She and I live in different states, so the plan is to follow the same training plan, and meet somewhere in October and run the race together.  Each of us have run a half marathon before, but that was at least one kid ago for both of us.

She lives on the east coast and is currently under 20+ inches of snow and I live in the upper midwest where the temps haven't been above freezing for at least a month.  She has 3 kids and I have 4.  Our husbands both work crazy hours, so this training is going to have to happen with the kids in tow.  Luckily we both have jogging strollers, so it shouldn't be too hard.  We figure we will start really training at the beginning of April when it is warm enough to actually take the kids out for extended periods of time.  I know this is way longer than most people usually take training for a 1/2 marathon, but we are doing it that way on purpose. 

I have had 2 reconstructive surgeries on my right knee.  I used to be a hardcore runner before I shredded it.  Since then, I can still run, but I have to work up to it very gradually or I will cause more injury to my already injured knee.  In order to avoid hurting it again, and because we will each be pushing 100 lbs. of kids, we decided to follow the walking schedule first and then move on to the running schedule.  Each one takes 12 weeks, so we are starting at the beginning of April and we will finish at the beginning of October.

We are following these schedules, created by Hal Higdon.  Walking and Running  He also has schedules for more advanced runners, but let's be honest.  We are not going for time, we are going for completion and for the health benefits that will come with it.   We are also shifting the days a bit because we want Sunday to be our rest day.

So what are we doing for the next 6 weeks until we start training?  We are getting our eating habits in check so that the food we eat is helping us in our goal and not hindering us.  We are increasing the amount of water we drink and decreasing the amount of sugar we eat.  We are starting with a sugar cleanse.  I'm sure if you googled "sugar cleanse" you would come up with lots of interesting things to try.  We aren't doing any of those things.  We are just cutting out sugar in all of it's forms.  These include the following:

                 (this is not an endorsement for this website.  I just liked the picture.)

• white sugar
• brown sugar
• cane sugar
• agave syrup
• honey
• stevia
• maple syrup
• fruit juice (still eating fruit, but not drinking the juice)
• white flour (which acts like sugar in the body once it is broken down)
• sugar substitutes (which are included in sodas, flavored drinks, etc.)

I will still use honey when I bake my 100% whole wheat bread, because yeast can't work unless it has some form of sugar to feed off of.

Why am I telling you all this?  Because saying it out loud and committing to do it means that I have to do it.  And I need your help to keep me accountable.  Are you with me?  Want to join in on the fun?

I'll post how I'm doing on my no sugar and once I start training what I am doing for workouts.  Feel free to join at any time and just post a comment telling me how you are doing each day.  We'll work together to become healthier, and I promise you will become happier in the process.

Ok, so we will start on Monday.  Ready, Set, GO!!!

Swine Flu Anyone?

E has swine flu. She has had a constant fever, aches, chills, no appetite, and an awesome cough. Her fever has been right around 103 for a couple of days. I hope it breaks soon. B and C now have fevers too and each of them is developing a pretty nice little cough. So far J seems fine. All 4 of them are on Tamiflu, so hopefully it doesn't get too bad. We are in quarantine for 7 days.

The saddest part is that because of the quarantine E doesn't get to finish the last few days of school and she is pretty bummed. I guess we are just going to hunker down and try to make this next week as enjoyable as possible. Lots of movies, lots of popcorn, and lots of meds.